she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
