Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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