Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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