because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Randomize
