There was a lot of him and a little penis
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize