It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
P.S. I can't hear my feet
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
This couple is walking their pig around campus
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
