I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Randomize
