I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
