My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
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