U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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