used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
