By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
