That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
