Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
