dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
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