If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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