32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Your penis caused this!
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