it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
