u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
