hell yes lets make some ravioli
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
