Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Randomize
