: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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