let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
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