1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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