i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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