Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
