Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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