Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Randomize
