We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Randomize
