words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
