so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
They have beer where we have blood.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
