so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I party with great urgency now.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
