Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
