the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Randomize
