I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize