He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
