Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
You need Xanax blowdarts
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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