Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
