I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Your tits are I can't wait for
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
This house was built for laser tag.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
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