Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
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