i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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