that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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