i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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