I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
