Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Randomize
