I want to stick my p in your. b.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
