Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
There r osticjed everywhere
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
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