YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Randomize
