Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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