he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
