This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
There r osticjed everywhere
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
